Yeah, it’s been a while since I updated this stuff, but shit happens, right? Anyways, here we go.
According to All Access, Gorillaz will be launching their new single “Stylo” on January 26th, with the new album expected March 2010. Stoked.
Kings of Leon are apparently going to head to Hawaii to make their new album sometime this year. Apparently, the producers are going to try to get them back to their old sound. I don’t know about that, but I know that if that if this new album isn’t any better, the Followills can go fuck themselves. I mean, really? First they make a shit album and become poster boys for MTV. Then, they are developing a clothing line, which is just plain unacceptable. So if this album isn’t REALLY good, that’s strike three.
Animal Collective made everyone and their mother’s top ten list of 2009. They made a decent album, but nowhere near as good as all of the media is claiming. Then again, we could ALWAYS count on Pitchfork for this kind of dick sucking bullshit.
Guns N’ Roses are back on tour, if you even consider it Guns N’ Roses anymore. They replaced Slash with some motherfucker who looks like he works at Hot Topic. Awesome, Axl! Is this dude ever gonna stop being lame?
Speaking of lame, Limp Bizkit have finished a new album and are calling it “Gold Cobra”. Fatty Fred is making it too easy to make fun of the band nowadays. At least he isn’t being a poser and wearing Joy Division shirts anymore.
Marilyn Manson is getting married to that girl from that god awful musical that ripped off the Beatles. Apparently, the gloomy couple got back together after Manson bugged her by making repeated phone calls to her house and making a music video in which he kills her lookalike. Just like Fatty Fred, it’s just too easy to make fun of this clown in make up nowadays.
Fallout Boy broke up. Just when you thought that this would be good news, apparently these dorks are forming a new band with the dudes from Anthrax called “The Damned Things”. Scott Ian needs to stick to making those crappy “I love the 80′s” things on VH1 instead of making this crappy project which is probably going to be nothing short of an Ear-raping.
Oasis is coming back!! Oh wait, Noel’s not in the band anymore, so they can’t technically call it Oasis can they? Apparently the least talented Gallagher, Liam, has decided that he is too lazy to make a new band name, so the new band with him, Andy Bell, Gem Archer, and Zak Starkey is still going to be called Oasis. He claims this is because he thinks people will still refer to it as Oasis even though Noel Gallagher is gone anyways. Um, kind of hard to think of this new band as Oasis without the dude who wrote the first 3 albums and has been carrying the band on his back since Day 1. Despite the fact that Andy Bell will be on the record (the dude who wrote “Turn Up the Sun” for Don’t Believe the Truth), we’re expecting a mediocre record if we’re lucky. Liam, you gotta get off the drugs, man. You’re blowing it.
Nine Inch Nails fans released a live DVD of the band that is actually pretty damn good. Head over to thisoneisonus.org for more info.
Lady Gaga, aka the bitch who thinks she is Madonna, David Bowie and Chris Crocker all rolled into one, made a new album. Pass.
John Fruisante left the Chili Peppers. Every fanboy is freaking out about this. Um, you guys realize that RHCP haven’t made a decent album since the 90′s right? These geezers are also going to be inducted into the Rock N Roll Hall of Fame, along the MUCH more deserving Iggy Pop and the Stooges.
Speaking of which, Iggy even asked “Does this mean I’m not cool anymore?” Classic.
Rage Against the Machine recently beat out some posers from another one of Simon Cowell’s crappy shows to have the number one song in England for Christmas. They even stated that they will play a free gig in UK in honor of the win. Anyone want to get me tickets?
And remember, always be above the influence dog: